


sometimes i just wanna cave (and i don't wanna fight)

by Underthegallowws



Series: at the crossroads (i'll hold your hand) [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M, SO PLEASE READ PART ONE FIRST, Sequel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:21:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26061853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Underthegallowws/pseuds/Underthegallowws
Summary: Sequel to "just hold me (I'm lonely)"For the loveliest of all the lovelies, aka Manon.
Relationships: Liam Dunbar/Theo Raeken
Series: at the crossroads (i'll hold your hand) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1892104
Comments: 5
Kudos: 84





	sometimes i just wanna cave (and i don't wanna fight)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [manonisamelon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/manonisamelon/gifts).



> So Manon asked for a sequel and she used the puppy-eyes emoji and everyone knows I can't say no to Manon. So here you go.  
> IMPORTANT : This does only make sense if you have read Part 1, which is here : https://archiveofourown.org/works/26011372

Theo comes back to life, inhaling a shattered breath of air. The ground is cold under him, and there is a wicked pain in his abdomen. He has to blink a few times to see more clearly, and he feels the tears leaving his eyes. 

“Fuck. Theo !”

Liam’s voice is a mix of panic, and surprise. The werewolf stops immediately his CPR, and there is something one his face, some mix of emotions that looks kind of like marvel. His cheeks are wet, his breathing laborious, and his heart… Theo can hear his heart beating so fast. The lingering smell of Tara’s flowers surrounds him still, and he tries to commit everything that just happened to his memory.

But the flowers are soon replaced by salt, and blood, as Liam pushes his sweatshirt towards the wound on his stomach. 

“You’re going to be okay. You’re going to be okay. You’re going to be okay.”

It sounds like a mantra. 

Theo doesn’t have the strength to answer. Instead, he just looks at Liam, who apparently spent twelve minutes trying to revive him. 

“They are coming. I called Mason and everybody is coming. You’re going to be okay. Fuck. Theo. Fuck.”

It’s too much, and not enough, so Theo lets himself slip into the dark, closing his eyes, and focusing on Tara. He saw Tara. Tara is somewhere around. Tara is okay. 

Tara forgave him. 

He loses consciousness, but this time, there is not bright forest waiting for him. Just a long waiting in the dark.

* * *

Theo doesn’t get better right away. Apparently, the crossbow had been laced with some kind of poison, and even with the antidote, he doesn’t heal at a supernatural pace. Melissa insists for him to stay at her house, and he doesn’t want to fight the nurse, so he agrees. It means he can have three warm meals a day, a comfortable bed, and some peace.

Liam comes every morning before school, and every evening after practice. He brings sweets, and talks for hours about whatever happened this day. The werewolf always finds something to say, something to laugh about, and he never touches the subject of what happened. Which is good. Theo is fine with just listening, and pretending he is still too weak to have a full conversation.

But in his mind, Tara’s words are clear as crystal.

_You’re longing for it, and if you keep ignoring it, or god help us, if you try pushing him away, you might close up for good. There might not be another chance. Time is running, little T._

It almost sounds like a prophecy. And every single time Liam leaves, Theo promises himself that tomorrow, tomorrow he will be strong enough to talk about it. 

But every tomorrow becomes a today, and today is never the day.

_Time is running, little T._

* * *

It’s been a week, and Melissa still hasn’t kicked him out. He is laying on the bed, one of his hands on his heart, trying to remember how Tara’s touch felt. The memories are already fading, and it’s like he just lost her. It’s his first time grieving her, grieving the big sister she could have been. He misses her, misses her smile, and her scent, and how good it had felt.

Sometimes, he wonder if he made the right choice. He could be with her, away from this terrible world, but he has chosen to go on. Why did he chose to go on ?

That’s when Liam enters the room. For once, his hair isn’t wet from the shower, and he isn’t smelling like grass, and sweat, which means he either didn’t go to training, or the coach has decided to give them the night. 

He knocks softly, and looks at Theo with resolve in his eyes.

“Melissa said you were better.”

Theo only nods, straightening himself against one of the pillows.

“Good. Because we need to talk.”

These words make him feel immediately sick in his stomach. Those are the kind of words someone says before a bad announcement. Before a break up. Before announcing a terrible news.

Liam walks towards him, and seats at the edge of the bed. He looks around the room, before sighing. His eyes avoid Theo, and he seems to struggle to find the words.

“You died, Theo.”

His voice sounds so worn out, like the idea is so awful that he can’t talk about it. Still, he seems to keep himself together, and continues.

“Your heart stopped beating. I don’t know for how long but…”

“Twelve minutes.” Theo whispers, and Liam turns to face him, surprised.

“How can you know that ?”

“It’s… complicated.”

How can he explain what happened? Liam is going to think he is nuts. Anyone would. But he knows, in his heart, that what happened was real. He knows, because he needs to believe it. 

Liam sighs.

"Complicated, uh."

His right hand squeezes his knee, like he is trying to contain whatever emotion he really feels. There is a part of Theo who wants to make him fell better, to say anything that could help, but there is another part who is curious. Liam is rarely so serious, and the way he is avoiding Theo's eyes means something.

He just doesn't know what exactly yet.

"You saved me", Theo whispers, trying to help him. "You..."

"You died !"

And now, Liam is finally looking at him, his eyes yellow, his whole body trying to contain the shift. There is anger coming from him, harsh and painful, and it's directed at Theo. It almost hurts. The werewolf swallows, before articulating his thoughts.

"You got hit. I thought it was okay. I thought you would be fine. You said you were fine. And then... And then... Do you remember ?"

"No." Theo doesn't have to lie. Everything that happened is a blur, in his head.

"You fell on the ground. There was blood everywhere. And you closed your eyes. And then... And then your heart fucking stopped. Your heart stopped !"

The anger is still there, mixed with desperation. Liam is not only mad at him. He is reliving his memories, and clearly, it's not going well. He needs to take a couple of breaths, trying to calm down, but his eyes do not seem to settle. On the contrary, they burn bright as he finally asks the question he clearly came for.

"Did you want to die, Theo ?"

And to that, the chimera has no answers. Liam doesn't let go.

"Did you fight, at least ? Because to me, it seemed like you accepted your death like you were waiting for it. You didn't even try."

Theo tries to find something to say, anything that would calm Liam, but the words are messed up in his head, and the werewolf must see the loss of words on his face, because he sighs.

"Yeah. That's what I thought."

And he stands up, clearly decided to leave the room. That's when Theo finally opens his mouth. 

"I chose to come back."

That stops Liam right on his heels. He turns, facing Theo, a look of incomprehension on his face.

"You chose..."

"To come back. Yes."

Theo sits himself a little bit straighter and manages to pat the cover of the bed.

"Please."

Liam is still looking at him like he is an error in a program, but at least, he slowly makes his way to the bed again.

"You chose to come back ?"

Theo nods.

"I can't tell you how I felt when I... I don't remember. But I can tell you that I didn't give up."

Liam doesn't react. He sits, his body tense. So, Theo continues.

"I just need you to trust me. I didn't give up."

Liam is staring again, his eyes slowly fading into their usual blue. He doesn't speak, but his face has always been easy to read for Theo. There is still anger, and he seems to be debating whether or not to believe what Theo said. In the end, his eyes lower on the bedspread, and he sighs.

"Fine. Whatever."

"Liam. I would not leave you."

That seems to touch a nerve, because Liam tenses immediately. 

"I said whatever."

And then, he is standing up again, adjusting his hoodie, his eyes on the door.

"I should get going. I have things to do."

"Liam..."

"Whatever, Theo. Whatever."

It sounds like he has given up. Without another glance, he reaches for the handle of the door, but Theo can hear his heart beating fast. 

_Time is running, little T._

He can't let Liam go. Not like this. He doesn't want this conversation, and his doubts hanging over their heads for the weeks or the months to come. Without thinking, Theo throws the bedsheet, and tries to get to Liam the quicker he can. The thing he didn't take into consideration is that it has been a week since he has tried standing on his own, and trying to run to the werewolf might have been a little bit cocky. He feels his legs giving up under him, and he falls on his knees in the middle of the bedroom, only saved by his hands against the blue carpet.

"Shit."

"Theo !"

Liam is next to him in an instant, and he can feel the werewolf trying to keep him upright. His whole body is aching, and the tear in his stomach is hurting again. He groans. Liam's hands are against his shoulders now, and his voice is worried.

"Are you okay ?"

There is no anger anymore. Just Liam's honesty, and his caring, everything that made Theo slowly fall for him. His scent is intoxicating, his body so close, and yet, so far. Theo tries to stand up, and he is thankful for the hands around his arms.

"Let's get you back to bed."

He doesn't say anything, because breathing is hard, and he feels kind of silly. What kind of supernatural creature falls on the floor ? He doesn't really have time to feel sorry for himself, because he is back on the bed, and Liam is ordering the pillows against his back. 

"There you go. Slowly".

There is a part of him who hates it, hates the fact that he can't even do this alone, and that he needs someone to help him. But there is also a part who already feels better, because Liam is here, and he is taking care of him like he doesn't want to flee anymore.

"I'm fine."

"That's exactly what you said before dying."

Liam's tone is playful, but there is something under it, a truth that still seems to hurt. Theo closes his eyes, breathes out, and then stares right at the werewolf.

"I'm sorry." He blurts out.

"For what ?" Liam asks, absentmindly trying to put back the bedspread on him. Theo takes his hand, making sure that all his attention is on him, which works, because Liam's head snaps to face him.

"I'm sorry it took me twelve fucking minutes to come back to you."

Liam swallows, his face sobered up, but he doesn't say a word. His hand is still crushed into Theo's one, but he manages to tangle his fingers with Theo's, and this simple gesture helps the older boy continue.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you how much I cared. Because I do. I care. And you fought for me, you didn't let go, you kept trying to revive me and..."

"Shhhh. It's fine", Liam tries in a whisper.

"No, it's not." Theo wishes his voice could convey all that he feels. "It's not, because you thought you'd lost me, and if the situations were reversed, I would be so fucking mad at you."

"I'm mad at you.", Liam manages, his voice still low.

"I know. And it's okay. You have every right to be. I just... I just want you to know that I fought too. I wanted to come back."

There is a silence, before Liam asks, his fingers playing against Theo's palm.

"Because you were afraid of Hell ?"

And at that, Theo has to laugh. He remembers the forest, he remembers his sister, and his options. Liam looks confused, but he doesn't let go.

"No. Far from it, actually. But I wanted to come back for _you_."

Liam doesn't answer right away. He seems to take into consideration this whole conversation, and Theo can see that it doesn't make sense to him.

"Why ?"

Theo inhales, then exhales. The truth. Liam deserves the truth, and here is his chance to make it right. He promised, after all.

_Don’t let my heart go to waste._

"Because I love you."

There. He said it. Finally. And as soon as the words leave his tongue, he feels like he has made a mistake, because you don't tell the person you love that you love them if you don't know if they love you back. Because that's a recipe for disaster, and he might be really good at handling disaster, but not when Liam is part of it. He feels his throat closing up, and he looks everywhere, but at the werewolf. He is already trying to find a way to get out of this situation when Liam finally talks.

"Hey, Theo. Theo, look at me now."

He swallows, but does as he is told.

Liam's face is open now, and there is even a small smile on his lips. His eyes are bright, but they are blue. There is no tension anymore, nothing left of the anger he used to display a few minutes ago. Just a boy, who is looking at someone he clearly cares about.

Oh. Liam cares about him. 

"Do you think I would have performed CPR for almost half an hour on anyone ?"

Theo swallows, hard.

"Twelve minutes, Li. Alway dramatic. And yes, you would probably do that. You're just the kind of person who..."

But he doesn't get a chance to finish his sentence, because Liam's free hand cups his jaw, and there are lips on his own. The kiss is brief, almost a touch, but Liam keeps his forehead against Theo's, and he has never been so close to those eyes, which are now staring at him like they can read his soul. Liam's breath is sweet against his mouth, and it takes Theo a few seconds to remember he has been holding his breath. He exhales, and Liam laughs. But his laugh is short-lived, because now, it's Theo's turn to kiss him, and he tries to make up for all those weeks of pining. Their lips move slowly, like they are taking their time discovering a new universe. The kiss is warm, and longer, and it's Liam's who breaks it.

"So it only took you dying for you to..."

Theo kisses him again, a little bit harder, his free hand finding Liam's hip, and he feels a moan against his lips. The werewolf tries again, a few seconds later, when they both have to take a break to breathe.

"So that's your new tactic when you don't want to talk about..."

_Yes it is._

* * *

Later that night, with Liam sleeping soundly close to him, Theo looks at the ceiling with a smile. He thinks about Tara, about everything she said, and what she felt like. His heart is still aching for the woman who could have been his sister, but he feels better than he ever was. He lets his hand travel on Liam's back, on his neck, and in his hair, ruffling them softly.

"I hope you saw that", he finally whispers to the night, picturing her dancing around the flowers she created in the forest. "Thank you, big T". 

Liam makes a noise next to him, and he choses not to add anything. Instead, he closes his eyes, and lets sleep take over him. One day, sooner or later, he knows he will see his sister again. It's only a question of time, after all.

And maybe he'll introduce her to Liam.

But that's another story.


End file.
